Mr. Castlebaum, my primary 5th and 6th grade teacher, wasn't a native of West Virginia. He was a New Jersey guy, and fresh out of college. Central West Virginia in 1977 wasn't Trenton, and Mr. Castlebaum always seemed a little stymied over the culture in which he was immersed.
In 6th grade, Mr. Castlebaum was also our softball coach. All rah-rah and prone to whistle-blowing, Coach Castlebaum was dedicated to getting every effort out of our boys team. He yelled, he screamed and he cursed. He cursed a lot. Hearing a teacher swear was sort of cool, really. It was so unusual, so rebellious, that it made practice even more fun.
Apparently some of my classmates and their parents didn't share my enthusiasm.
One day after lunch, Mr. Castlebaum began calling each of the 6th grade softball players into the hallway, one at a time. My turn came early in the rotation:
"Do you like playing softball?" he asked, obviously nervous.
"Sure."
"When we're practicing softball, you've never heard me use swear words, have you?"
"Well, yeah. A few times." It became suddenly clear why Coach Castelbaum was nervous, and where this was heading. Someone had complained.
"No, you haven't." And he said it with a sneer. It was less a disagreement and more of here's-how-this-is-gonna-go, kid.
"Yeah, I've heard you curse. Sometimes you swear at us kids, and you've said the F-word a lot. The one that rhymes with truck."
"I think you're mistaken," he said. He leaned down, and toward my face.
I don't know what kids are like in Jersey, but kids from the holler aren't intimidated that easily. I didn't easily roll over for teachers, especially if it was clear the teacher was trying to weasel out of something he knew was wrong.
"Yeah, you did it. I didn't tell anybody, because it was no big deal. But you did it. You did it a lot."
I walked back inside, sat at the desk and waited as he called other students into the hall to grill them. A couple of them came back in sort of teary-eyed.
I've been suspicious of teachers since.
Behavior like Mr. Castlebaum demonstrated creates an environment where kids are fearful of stepping out of the norm. It promotes the dumbing down of dreams and ambition, and helps above average kids become just average. It dooms less than average kids.
It's my opinion that in order to educate kids, teachers have to encourage and inspire them. Make kids believe in themselves, always being thoughtful not to do anything that will discourage a kid to dream, and to set lofty goals. We have too few teachers that do that on a day-to-day basis. And although I'm saddened when I hear a story that reminds me of Mr. Castlebaum, I'm no longer amazed.
Last night at dinner, my 11-year-old daughter was telling us about her day at school. She was upset about a conversation that occurred with her female Health teacher earlier that day.
"The teacher said women shouldn't be President." Although we haven't heard Maddisen say she wanted to be The Prez, we've never discouraged her from from setting any sort of appropriate goal. We've been especially thoughtful about not discouraging her from setting goals based on societal expectations of gender.
That's just the way we live our life.
"How did she come up with that idea?" I asked, trying to hide my anger.
"She just said her husband always told her women shouldn't be President, and she can't vote for a woman because of that. She kept saying 'Believe me, we don't want a woman for a president!' over and over."
I suddenly had that old feeling of being called into the hallway back in 6th grade.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Monday, February 25, 2008
Juno
My idea for a blog called The Film Geek was inspired during a walk to lunch with my friend, Hoyt. As we walked to the restaurant--a local Chinese place, I recall--we struck up a conversation about our mutual passion: movies.
Now, Hoyt knows a lot more about movies than I do. He has a real love and admiration for the history and the art of film, but he digs a great popcorn flick too. Like me, he gets geeked up over all kids of movies. We also share a frustration with seeing too few films in the big screen these days. Neither seems to have the time to view as many in-house movies as we would like.
When I learned that Hoyt made it out to see Juno earlier this year (and knew I wasn't gonna get to), I asked him to write a review about his experience for this blog. I was thrilled he agreed.
Enjoy.
When Film Geek invited me to write a review of "Juno,"my first thought was "Cool!" My second thought was"Oh, man, the pressure is on me now because, Film Geek is THE guy who really crafts a great flick post!" That's what you expect from a Film Geek film review.
My expectations for a flick work on me in a similar way and often influence my reaction to it. There's nothing like having a low expectation for a film and having it exceed your initial impression. On the flipside, it truly sucks when a film all your friends have raved about does not deliver on its promise.
Before I saw "Juno" a few weeks ago, it was difficult for anyone to miss the film's hype. For awhile, it seemed like Diablo Cody, Juno's screenwriter, had taken over the helm of "Entertainment Weekly." Reviews praising "Juno" seemed to appear every issue, then Cody become a frequent contributor to the magazine, then more acclaim followed. So on that Wednesday afternoon when I finally played hooky to catch a matinee of "Juno," I expected "Juno" would mark yet another disappointing moment when my anticipation of a flick exceeded its fulfillment.
But I was wrong. "Juno" rocks. That's not to suggest that I think this film is the 141st best film ever as currently ranked by IMDb users (it's actually the172nd best film ever) or that it's one of my favorite films (not yet because that takes time) or that you should drop everything and go watch it before you see the Oscars (and that wouldn't be the worst idea, either). But Diablo Cody, Ellen Page and company have created something special on celluloid (man, I dig using that word!), and I have no doubt that Cody will win the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay tonight.
If there's any justice, Ellen Page will snag a Best Actress award, too.
Juno MacGuff is a teenage girl who gets pregnant by accident. What marks "Juno" as a unique film is how Juno approaches this event and how her family, friends and the couple who seek to adopt her baby react toJuno's situation.
Ellen Page, as I've noted, merits an Oscar for "Juno."Some have suggested that she's simply playing herself. To those that have, I suggest that they watch Page's performance in "Hard Candy"--where she portrays a14-year-old girl who turns the tables on a pedophile. (Insert yet another parenthetical here: If you haveNetflix, add "Hard Candy" to your "Q" and bump it to the top.) Page can act, and she infuses her performances in "Juno" with such perfect nuances that it's easy to forget she's acting.
Although Page didn't surprise me with her performance, Jason Bateman did. It's tough for me not to think of Bateman as Ricky Schroeder's nemesis from "SilverSpoons," and, again, it rocks when something exceeds your expectations. Bateman's acting did that for me.
What else can I tell you? Jennifer Garner displays she's not simply another beautiful actress from action movies; Michael Cera leaves no doubt that he's got the chops after "Superbad," and, please, someone make sure that J.K. Simmons nabs more acting roles in major motion pictures.
Finally, on the day I caught "Juno," I was the only one in the theater, and several times I heard myself "laugh out loud" at what I saw on the screen. I don't often do that, and considering how sick I was at the time, I take my laughter as another indication of how wonderful "Juno" plays as a comedy. (I would have probably cried a little, too, if I had felt better.)
Thanks, Film Geek, for letting me share my thoughts here on "Juno," and I'm hoping that you have a chance to review every flick that's nominated for the 2009 Oscars!
Now, Hoyt knows a lot more about movies than I do. He has a real love and admiration for the history and the art of film, but he digs a great popcorn flick too. Like me, he gets geeked up over all kids of movies. We also share a frustration with seeing too few films in the big screen these days. Neither seems to have the time to view as many in-house movies as we would like.
When I learned that Hoyt made it out to see Juno earlier this year (and knew I wasn't gonna get to), I asked him to write a review about his experience for this blog. I was thrilled he agreed.
Enjoy.
When Film Geek invited me to write a review of "Juno,"my first thought was "Cool!" My second thought was"Oh, man, the pressure is on me now because, Film Geek is THE guy who really crafts a great flick post!" That's what you expect from a Film Geek film review.
My expectations for a flick work on me in a similar way and often influence my reaction to it. There's nothing like having a low expectation for a film and having it exceed your initial impression. On the flipside, it truly sucks when a film all your friends have raved about does not deliver on its promise.
Before I saw "Juno" a few weeks ago, it was difficult for anyone to miss the film's hype. For awhile, it seemed like Diablo Cody, Juno's screenwriter, had taken over the helm of "Entertainment Weekly." Reviews praising "Juno" seemed to appear every issue, then Cody become a frequent contributor to the magazine, then more acclaim followed. So on that Wednesday afternoon when I finally played hooky to catch a matinee of "Juno," I expected "Juno" would mark yet another disappointing moment when my anticipation of a flick exceeded its fulfillment.
But I was wrong. "Juno" rocks. That's not to suggest that I think this film is the 141st best film ever as currently ranked by IMDb users (it's actually the172nd best film ever) or that it's one of my favorite films (not yet because that takes time) or that you should drop everything and go watch it before you see the Oscars (and that wouldn't be the worst idea, either). But Diablo Cody, Ellen Page and company have created something special on celluloid (man, I dig using that word!), and I have no doubt that Cody will win the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay tonight.
If there's any justice, Ellen Page will snag a Best Actress award, too.
Juno MacGuff is a teenage girl who gets pregnant by accident. What marks "Juno" as a unique film is how Juno approaches this event and how her family, friends and the couple who seek to adopt her baby react toJuno's situation.
Ellen Page, as I've noted, merits an Oscar for "Juno."Some have suggested that she's simply playing herself. To those that have, I suggest that they watch Page's performance in "Hard Candy"--where she portrays a14-year-old girl who turns the tables on a pedophile. (Insert yet another parenthetical here: If you haveNetflix, add "Hard Candy" to your "Q" and bump it to the top.) Page can act, and she infuses her performances in "Juno" with such perfect nuances that it's easy to forget she's acting.
Although Page didn't surprise me with her performance, Jason Bateman did. It's tough for me not to think of Bateman as Ricky Schroeder's nemesis from "SilverSpoons," and, again, it rocks when something exceeds your expectations. Bateman's acting did that for me.
What else can I tell you? Jennifer Garner displays she's not simply another beautiful actress from action movies; Michael Cera leaves no doubt that he's got the chops after "Superbad," and, please, someone make sure that J.K. Simmons nabs more acting roles in major motion pictures.
Finally, on the day I caught "Juno," I was the only one in the theater, and several times I heard myself "laugh out loud" at what I saw on the screen. I don't often do that, and considering how sick I was at the time, I take my laughter as another indication of how wonderful "Juno" plays as a comedy. (I would have probably cried a little, too, if I had felt better.)
Thanks, Film Geek, for letting me share my thoughts here on "Juno," and I'm hoping that you have a chance to review every flick that's nominated for the 2009 Oscars!
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Live Bloggin' The 2008 Oscars
Pre-Oscar Ramblings:
Because I Care: To prepare a bit, I snuck in a viewing of Michael Clayton late last night and into the wee hours of this morning. I agree with Spike Nesmith, who was kind enough to guest review the film here some months ago. It's a riveting, well told story with powerful performances. Clayton definitely deserves a spot in the final category.
The Razzies: The Lindsay Lohan vehicle I Know Who Killed Me picked up the most awards as Worst Film of 2007. The flick was so bad, it received the most jesus-what-a-terrible-movie wins in the 28-year history of the Razzie. In addition to two nominations for Lohan as worst actress (she played two roles), I Know Who won for "worst picture, director, screenplay, remake or rip-off, screen couple and excuse for a horror movie."
What Did She Mean By That? During my late-night Michael Clayton experience, Mrs. Film Geek says, quietly:
"Did you know Tilda Swinton has an open marriage, and lives with and travels with her 20-something male lover?"
As she said it her voice sort of trailed off, and I thought I saw a wistful smirk...
Making The Grade: If you're up for it, Moviefone presents The Ultimate Oscar Quiz, twenty questions that are sure to test your film geekiness. Click the link (the blue "Making The Grade") and give it a shot. My score was a woeful 7 out of 20 correct!
Non-Award Prediction: My prediction for the most over-used cliche on the red carpet: "Baby bump." (Running total: 1,1,1,1)
Red Carpet Observations:
Pre RC Coverage: E! has six hours of pre-red carpet coverage, followed by two hours of Ryan Seacrest and Giuliana Rancic Red Carpet Celebrity Ass Kissing. I just learned from the newspaper today that Rancic is the wife of original The Apprentice winner, Bill Rancic.
Bill really does know how to cash in.
Kim Who?: I'm always annoyed when a "socialite" is inter-mixed with true film artists. Having Kim Kardashian and her sisters involved in red carpet discussion is rather like having The Film Geek talking about the Theory of Special Relativity. She's just out of her element. Of course, the only film work she ever did was her own sex tape.
Are Those Bat-Nipples? The TV Guide Channel just did a quick interview with George Clooney. It's true Clooney is as cool and as talented as they come. But for the life of me, I don't think I can ever forgive him for being part of 1997's Batman & Robin. It was the movie that put nipples on the bat-suit.
Just 'Cause I'm Curious: I wonder how celebrities decide when it's the right moment to show up at the Academy Awards. I'm sure many work that fashionably late mojo, but when is it too early to start up the red carpet. One of the first carpet walking couple was Heidi Klum and Seal.
I think that answers my question.
Retro: Who talked Jillian Barberi into wearing a Farrah Fawcett hairstyle?
Starting To Make Me Feel Inferior: All this talk about George Clooney being The Man is starting to make me suck in my gut a little harder...
Clooney was just interviewed by Ryan Seacrest. I'm reminded that he's so hot that given the right conditions, even I might do him.
This Just In: Jason Bateman just confirmed there may be an Arrested Development flick!
GRRRRR!: Steve Carell's wife, after being the butt of a joke from Seacrest, looks as if she'd like to punch the American Idol host in the mouth. Which makes two of us.
I Just Don't Get It: John Travolta's success, that is. Never have.
Uh oh...: Gary Busey is in duh house! The red carpet could get interesting. Seacrest looks like he wants to call security. Busey keep blabbing about wanting to talk to Seacrest, because he "likes [Ryan's] energy."
Huh?
Seacrest was successful in shooing Busey away. It was funny seeing him want nothing to do with the actor.
Go Patriots: Some fat thirty-something guy from George Washington (WV) High School and his buddies are sitting around their living rooms, watching former classmate Jennifer Gardner, and yelling: "Oh yeah, I totally hit that!"
But they didn't.
The Awards Show
The Monologue: Jon Stewart is on top of his game, as usual. Less picking at the audience this year (last year he went hard at Clooney), and stuck to an eclectic set of jokes that seemed to go over well. It was a low-key opening set, and it worked.
Costume Design Award: Damn it!! The designer from Elizabeth won, and I picked Sweeney Todd. There goes my chance at winning the Oscar office pool!
The First :45 minutes: Sorry, I was in the kitchen making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Did I miss anything?
Male Actor In A Supporting Role: Javier Bardem was the easy money, but I sure liked Tom Wilkinson's work in Michael Clayton. Wilkinson's been a favorite of mine for a long time, and he seems to always give terrific performances. But Bardem's Anton Chigurh is a classic character.
Oscar Flashback: Anyone remember the Three Six Mafia? Didn't think so.
Female Actor In A Supporting Role: As good as Tilda Swinton is in Michael Clayton, her win is a bit of a surprise to me. I just didn't think her role was large enough for the award. My pick was Amy Ryan, from Gone Baby Gone.
Female Actor In A Leading Role: Marion Cotillard's speech was sweet, and reminded me of Roberto Benigni's speech from a few years back. What happened to that guy?
"Stop Eating Really Sour Candy": What someone needs to remind Rene Zellweger before she gets on camera.
The First 2.5 hours: The show feels a bit slow, and even scaled down. I'm curious how much the writer's strike affected the development of the show. A montage now and again is nice, but the production seems to be relying too much on them.
Am I wrong?
The Person That I Didn't Know Died This Year: Suzanne Pleshette
Diablo Cody: Who's the last one-hit writing superstar you can name? Seriously, Cody's got it going on. We're gonna see a whole lot of this lady's work in the future. (And cool dress, too.)
Male Actor In A Leading Role: (Crossing my fingers for Clooney. Say it...say it...c'mon, say it...) And the award goes to... Daniel Day Lewis. Well, that' just as good. Day Lewis doesn't male many movies, but when he does make one he's remarkable.
Achievement In Directing: Joel and Ethan Coen win in what was, I think, the lock of the night.
Best Picture: Hooray! A movie I've seen wins! No Country For Old Men is deserving. It's a near-masterpiece.
Summary
The 2008 Academy Awards was one of the least entertaining productions I've seen. The red carpet was mostly uneventful, and the awards show crept along and seemed scaled down. At least the movies it honored were terrific.
Because I Care: To prepare a bit, I snuck in a viewing of Michael Clayton late last night and into the wee hours of this morning. I agree with Spike Nesmith, who was kind enough to guest review the film here some months ago. It's a riveting, well told story with powerful performances. Clayton definitely deserves a spot in the final category.
The Razzies: The Lindsay Lohan vehicle I Know Who Killed Me picked up the most awards as Worst Film of 2007. The flick was so bad, it received the most jesus-what-a-terrible-movie wins in the 28-year history of the Razzie. In addition to two nominations for Lohan as worst actress (she played two roles), I Know Who won for "worst picture, director, screenplay, remake or rip-off, screen couple and excuse for a horror movie."
What Did She Mean By That? During my late-night Michael Clayton experience, Mrs. Film Geek says, quietly:
"Did you know Tilda Swinton has an open marriage, and lives with and travels with her 20-something male lover?"
As she said it her voice sort of trailed off, and I thought I saw a wistful smirk...
Making The Grade: If you're up for it, Moviefone presents The Ultimate Oscar Quiz, twenty questions that are sure to test your film geekiness. Click the link (the blue "Making The Grade") and give it a shot. My score was a woeful 7 out of 20 correct!
Non-Award Prediction: My prediction for the most over-used cliche on the red carpet: "Baby bump." (Running total: 1,1,1,1)
Red Carpet Observations:
Pre RC Coverage: E! has six hours of pre-red carpet coverage, followed by two hours of Ryan Seacrest and Giuliana Rancic Red Carpet Celebrity Ass Kissing. I just learned from the newspaper today that Rancic is the wife of original The Apprentice winner, Bill Rancic.
Bill really does know how to cash in.
Kim Who?: I'm always annoyed when a "socialite" is inter-mixed with true film artists. Having Kim Kardashian and her sisters involved in red carpet discussion is rather like having The Film Geek talking about the Theory of Special Relativity. She's just out of her element. Of course, the only film work she ever did was her own sex tape.
Are Those Bat-Nipples? The TV Guide Channel just did a quick interview with George Clooney. It's true Clooney is as cool and as talented as they come. But for the life of me, I don't think I can ever forgive him for being part of 1997's Batman & Robin. It was the movie that put nipples on the bat-suit.
Just 'Cause I'm Curious: I wonder how celebrities decide when it's the right moment to show up at the Academy Awards. I'm sure many work that fashionably late mojo, but when is it too early to start up the red carpet. One of the first carpet walking couple was Heidi Klum and Seal.
I think that answers my question.
Retro: Who talked Jillian Barberi into wearing a Farrah Fawcett hairstyle?
Starting To Make Me Feel Inferior: All this talk about George Clooney being The Man is starting to make me suck in my gut a little harder...
Clooney was just interviewed by Ryan Seacrest. I'm reminded that he's so hot that given the right conditions, even I might do him.
This Just In: Jason Bateman just confirmed there may be an Arrested Development flick!
GRRRRR!: Steve Carell's wife, after being the butt of a joke from Seacrest, looks as if she'd like to punch the American Idol host in the mouth. Which makes two of us.
I Just Don't Get It: John Travolta's success, that is. Never have.
Uh oh...: Gary Busey is in duh house! The red carpet could get interesting. Seacrest looks like he wants to call security. Busey keep blabbing about wanting to talk to Seacrest, because he "likes [Ryan's] energy."
Huh?
Seacrest was successful in shooing Busey away. It was funny seeing him want nothing to do with the actor.
Go Patriots: Some fat thirty-something guy from George Washington (WV) High School and his buddies are sitting around their living rooms, watching former classmate Jennifer Gardner, and yelling: "Oh yeah, I totally hit that!"
But they didn't.
The Awards Show
The Monologue: Jon Stewart is on top of his game, as usual. Less picking at the audience this year (last year he went hard at Clooney), and stuck to an eclectic set of jokes that seemed to go over well. It was a low-key opening set, and it worked.
Costume Design Award: Damn it!! The designer from Elizabeth won, and I picked Sweeney Todd. There goes my chance at winning the Oscar office pool!
The First :45 minutes: Sorry, I was in the kitchen making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Did I miss anything?
Male Actor In A Supporting Role: Javier Bardem was the easy money, but I sure liked Tom Wilkinson's work in Michael Clayton. Wilkinson's been a favorite of mine for a long time, and he seems to always give terrific performances. But Bardem's Anton Chigurh is a classic character.
Oscar Flashback: Anyone remember the Three Six Mafia? Didn't think so.
Female Actor In A Supporting Role: As good as Tilda Swinton is in Michael Clayton, her win is a bit of a surprise to me. I just didn't think her role was large enough for the award. My pick was Amy Ryan, from Gone Baby Gone.
Female Actor In A Leading Role: Marion Cotillard's speech was sweet, and reminded me of Roberto Benigni's speech from a few years back. What happened to that guy?
"Stop Eating Really Sour Candy": What someone needs to remind Rene Zellweger before she gets on camera.
The First 2.5 hours: The show feels a bit slow, and even scaled down. I'm curious how much the writer's strike affected the development of the show. A montage now and again is nice, but the production seems to be relying too much on them.
Am I wrong?
The Person That I Didn't Know Died This Year: Suzanne Pleshette
Diablo Cody: Who's the last one-hit writing superstar you can name? Seriously, Cody's got it going on. We're gonna see a whole lot of this lady's work in the future. (And cool dress, too.)
Male Actor In A Leading Role: (Crossing my fingers for Clooney. Say it...say it...c'mon, say it...) And the award goes to... Daniel Day Lewis. Well, that' just as good. Day Lewis doesn't male many movies, but when he does make one he's remarkable.
Achievement In Directing: Joel and Ethan Coen win in what was, I think, the lock of the night.
Best Picture: Hooray! A movie I've seen wins! No Country For Old Men is deserving. It's a near-masterpiece.
Summary
The 2008 Academy Awards was one of the least entertaining productions I've seen. The red carpet was mostly uneventful, and the awards show crept along and seemed scaled down. At least the movies it honored were terrific.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Friday, February 22, 2008
Film Scenes That Matter: The Usual Suspects
"I know who Keyser Soze is," Mrs. Film Geek leaned in and whispered, less than mid-way through the flick.
I didn't wanna hear any of it. Damn it, that woman can ferret out a plot twist like nobody else I know! "Pass me the popcorn, and shut the hell up," I replied.
And then I settled in to watch this masterpiece:
I didn't wanna hear any of it. Damn it, that woman can ferret out a plot twist like nobody else I know! "Pass me the popcorn, and shut the hell up," I replied.
And then I settled in to watch this masterpiece:
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Don Surber Hates The Heat
According to Don Surber of the Charleston (WV) Daily Mail, "Americans never had it as good" as we do now. "The middle class has become the rich," he says, and argues that even Americans living in poverty are better off now than at any other time.
Surber's rationale? America has efficient and readily available air conditioning.
Seriously, that's a major point in his most recent Daily Mail column. Read it, and count the total number of A/C references he uses in an attempt to prove we Americans should stop dwelling on the plight of the poor.
Better yet, I'll count it for you:
1. "Having actually worked at a textile mill, I say the people in Bangladesh are welcome to make my shirts. I'll sit here in my smoke-free, air-conditioned-in-the-summer office where I don't have to worry about brown lung";
2. "Most of today's homes have some sort of air-conditioning. The Census Bureau reported 58 percent of homes in 2004 had central air-conditioning, and 25 percent had room air-conditioners";
3. "But the Census Bureau reported that 46 percent of households listed as officially living in poverty actually lived in homes they owned. And, the Census Bureau reported, 76 percent had air-conditioning";
4. "But why should I care how much money is in the wallets of the two richest men in America - Bill Gates and Warren Buffett - both supporters of the Obama campaign? So what? I have my central air. And I drive a 2005 Mustang convertible - just like Mitt Romney."
For good measure, Surber threw in the stats that 73% of Americans living in poverty have a microwave, while 33% had a dishwasher. Considering his logic, I'm surprised Surber didn't mention that 100% of all new cars manufactured and sold in the US now have seat belts.
Americans never had it so good!
Many Americans are one catastrophic illness away from losing everything. More than one million high school students drop out of school every year. 4 children die from abuse every day of the year in America. About 5.5 million children in America are being raised by their grandparents, a necessity mostly because so many natural parents are unavailable due to substance abuse, incarceration, child abuse, neglect and desertion.
But most of 'em got air!
Too bad they don't know how good they have it.
Surber's rationale? America has efficient and readily available air conditioning.
Seriously, that's a major point in his most recent Daily Mail column. Read it, and count the total number of A/C references he uses in an attempt to prove we Americans should stop dwelling on the plight of the poor.
Better yet, I'll count it for you:
1. "Having actually worked at a textile mill, I say the people in Bangladesh are welcome to make my shirts. I'll sit here in my smoke-free, air-conditioned-in-the-summer office where I don't have to worry about brown lung";
2. "Most of today's homes have some sort of air-conditioning. The Census Bureau reported 58 percent of homes in 2004 had central air-conditioning, and 25 percent had room air-conditioners";
3. "But the Census Bureau reported that 46 percent of households listed as officially living in poverty actually lived in homes they owned. And, the Census Bureau reported, 76 percent had air-conditioning";
4. "But why should I care how much money is in the wallets of the two richest men in America - Bill Gates and Warren Buffett - both supporters of the Obama campaign? So what? I have my central air. And I drive a 2005 Mustang convertible - just like Mitt Romney."
For good measure, Surber threw in the stats that 73% of Americans living in poverty have a microwave, while 33% had a dishwasher. Considering his logic, I'm surprised Surber didn't mention that 100% of all new cars manufactured and sold in the US now have seat belts.
Americans never had it so good!
Many Americans are one catastrophic illness away from losing everything. More than one million high school students drop out of school every year. 4 children die from abuse every day of the year in America. About 5.5 million children in America are being raised by their grandparents, a necessity mostly because so many natural parents are unavailable due to substance abuse, incarceration, child abuse, neglect and desertion.
But most of 'em got air!
Too bad they don't know how good they have it.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Hannah Montana & Miley Cyrus Best Of Both Worlds Concert
Or, "A One Hour, 14 Minute Documentary Of How Much I Love My Children."
Sometime early Saturday morning my daughter Griffyn reminded me I promised to take her to the movies this weekend. "Don't forget your promise about the mooo-vees" she said in her way-too-cute southern accent. So, I didn't.
We arrived at the box office just before the 4pm showing.
"That will be four or five dollars," I heard the ticket seller say after I asked for tickets for two kids and one adult. The quote made no sense to me. Even at the before 6pm price, I expected three tickets to cost at least $15.
"Why so cheap?" I asked. I slid my debit card through the slot for her to swipe, and was starting to get that feeling one gets when he believes he just found a real bargain.
"I'm sorry, what did you say?" she replied as she took my card.
"I asked why the tickets are so cheap. Even at matinee prices, four or five dollars is way, way inexpensive. I don't understand how it's that low."
"You misunderstood. I said it's forty-five dollars. $45.00 for three tickets."
Swipe!
She handed me the receipt to sign, and reminded me to pick up our 3-D glasses from the ticket taker.
3-D glasses!?! At least I got to keep something for that price.
Sometime early Saturday morning my daughter Griffyn reminded me I promised to take her to the movies this weekend. "Don't forget your promise about the mooo-vees" she said in her way-too-cute southern accent. So, I didn't.
We arrived at the box office just before the 4pm showing.
"That will be four or five dollars," I heard the ticket seller say after I asked for tickets for two kids and one adult. The quote made no sense to me. Even at the before 6pm price, I expected three tickets to cost at least $15.
"Why so cheap?" I asked. I slid my debit card through the slot for her to swipe, and was starting to get that feeling one gets when he believes he just found a real bargain.
"I'm sorry, what did you say?" she replied as she took my card.
"I asked why the tickets are so cheap. Even at matinee prices, four or five dollars is way, way inexpensive. I don't understand how it's that low."
"You misunderstood. I said it's forty-five dollars. $45.00 for three tickets."
Swipe!
She handed me the receipt to sign, and reminded me to pick up our 3-D glasses from the ticket taker.
3-D glasses!?! At least I got to keep something for that price.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Neverwas
Don't let the cast of Neverwas fool you into renting this movie!
The casting of Aaron Eckhart, Ian McKellen, William Hurt, Brittany Murphy, Alan Cumming and Jessica Lang seems inspired; but, unfortunately, the line-up can do nothing to save this flick from being a total disaster.
It's premise starts out fine: The adult son (Eckhart) of a beloved children's book author (Nolte) becomes a psychiatrist, and returns to the institution that once treated his father for his mental illness. Nolte's character, depressed for most of his life, committed suicide several years earlier, and Echardt's character needs closure on the tragedy. Hanging out at the institution, he thinks, will provide him that opportunity to heal himself.
Instead, his decision throws him into a series of situations that entwine him within the fable of his father's most famous book.
Neverwas intends to make a statement about human dignity and self worth. It misses terribly. Instead, it's a ridiculous and melodramatic nightmare.
The casting of Aaron Eckhart, Ian McKellen, William Hurt, Brittany Murphy, Alan Cumming and Jessica Lang seems inspired; but, unfortunately, the line-up can do nothing to save this flick from being a total disaster.
It's premise starts out fine: The adult son (Eckhart) of a beloved children's book author (Nolte) becomes a psychiatrist, and returns to the institution that once treated his father for his mental illness. Nolte's character, depressed for most of his life, committed suicide several years earlier, and Echardt's character needs closure on the tragedy. Hanging out at the institution, he thinks, will provide him that opportunity to heal himself.
Instead, his decision throws him into a series of situations that entwine him within the fable of his father's most famous book.
Neverwas intends to make a statement about human dignity and self worth. It misses terribly. Instead, it's a ridiculous and melodramatic nightmare.
Friday, February 15, 2008
He Who Throws Dirt Is Losing Ground
Bloomberg.com reports that China (the country, not the former WWE wrestler-slash-reality TV personality) has blocked the production of a Hollywood flick about the Japanese occupation of China in 1941.
It seems China was concerned that the movie, which stars John Cusack, might portray the country in a negative manner.
Someone should remind China it's rep ain't all that to begin with:
It seems China was concerned that the movie, which stars John Cusack, might portray the country in a negative manner.
Someone should remind China it's rep ain't all that to begin with:
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Admitting It Is The First Step To Recovery
Just in time for the Holiday O' Lovers, Appalachian Being is sponsoring a "Sorry For Being A Dick" poetry contest.
Buzzardbilly hit the nail on the head! Although I'm not a poet, I have on many occasion been perceived as a real tool.
Here's my entry:
Buzzardbilly hit the nail on the head! Although I'm not a poet, I have on many occasion been perceived as a real tool.
Here's my entry:
I.
For office supplies,
bad tape mixes and those times
I simply forgot
II.
I'm sorry, I swear
I wasn't being thoughtless.
I was just a dick.
I'm sorry, I swear
I wasn't being thoughtless.
I was just a dick.
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